Book: Why I Care and Why Care Matters by Ed Davey

Sir Ed Davey MP has been leader of the Liberal Democrats since 2020 and MP for Kingston and Surbiton since 2017, and previously from 1997 until 20I5.He was Energy Minister in the Coalition Government .

He is also my MP. Sixteen years ago I climbed scaffolding with him at a local historic Catholic church in Surbiton to write an article!

Whilst autobiographical, this book is no political polemic; it is a heartfelt book about care and carers from personal experience. Davey knows all about care and caring with its pitfalls, its highs and lows. He was a child carer, his son is physically disabled with severe learning difficulties, and his wife has been diagnosed with multiple sclerosis .

He cared for his grandmother in later life, who had been a key figure in his upbringing. He arranged care for her in the same very expensive but excellent nursing home where my mother moved to. In my case I lost our family home and inheritance to fund her good care.

How he manages to be a leading politician and be actively involved in the day today care of his son's care as well as supporting his wife shows the mettle of the man. Caring is exhausting, it is a twenty-four-hour plus job, yet he manages to combine all the threads with good humour and positivity. He writes openly about all aspects of care, writing in a conversational style.

He falls into the trap of so many nowadays of beginning sentences with a preposition. I'm sure having been educated at an independent school (in Nottingham) and then Oxford he was told that it was bad grammar!

However, it is a compelling read. Writing about personal experience of care can be cathartic, as I later discovered. Davey speaks passionately about care in Parliament and in the media. He was not always so vocal I recall when I was seeking advice in my early battles, as it seemed, with local services supporting dementia care, but he is now a man on a mission.

Many will gain new found respect for him on reading this book, both personally and as a politician. He is considered by many as the most popular of the UK political party leaders, despite his political stunts -or maybe because of them! I wonder if he is releasing his inner child which was suppressed when he was caring for his mother at home aged nine, together with his brothers, until her death when he was fifteen.

His father died when he was four.

He mentions that he felt let down by the local church, where the family had been active ,when his mother was ill. No one visited, yet offered prayers. Practical support was needed.

However later Davey refers to taking his son to church, where he is welcomed by the community.

He and his wife's devotion to their son and endeavours in travelling to Hungary to gain specialist help for him to achieve so much more than was expected are heartwarming.

How much is he guided by faith? It would be good to ask him that question. Certainly, his experience of caring affects his perspective on the value of human life and he has voted against the Assisted Dying Bill pressing for greater care, including palliative care.

He includes three chapters about four carers in his constituency and references local support groups including the excellent Kingston Carers Network and Young Carers Network. It is important to have support whilst caring although finding time to avail of some of the activities on offer can, in my experience, be difficult.

Writing about an elderly mother caring for her middle aged son he focuses on their individual perspectives of what is happening in a dialogue, letting each speak in the first person reflecting about the other to great effect as in a play-except this narrative is reality in all its messiness and love.

Love is what caring is all about, and what enriches us as human beings. Davey writes poignantly and to great effect of 'the immense fulfilment of both caring and being cared for'.

He feels strongly that unpaid family carers voice should be heard, valued and supported as a focal point of policy on care.

Paid carers too should have higher wages and more qualifications. He sees a national register of carers such as for doctors and nurses essential and calls for a Royal College of Carers.

'The good in all of us has been shaped by care, 'he writes, 'Hold a mirror up to that and we'll realise our potential.'

Anyone who has been a carer will identify with everything Davey raises in this book, both from his own experiences and the aspirational hopes for a better care system.

Published by Harper North 2025 - Hardback - ISBN 978-00-00 875791-5 - Price:£20